The Life Of A Cheese Grater
10,000 years ago there was a caveman walking around talking on his mobile telecommunications device when he stumbled on a shiny piece of metal which was made of plastic. The bewildered caveman took his new piece of fabric home where his wife was cooking sticks and pasta on her new Euronics eco-friendly cooker which she bought for 500 children from Woolworths which had just started its 10000 year closing down sale as it couldn’t find any suppliers and at that time Amdrew-Lloyd Webbers’ music was actually in the charts. The caveman took his piece of glass and carved it into a shiny Television which is now called a cheese grater. He was very proud of his invention as he could make a sandwich and watch Eastenders at the same time which in those days was watched by 38 people (94% of the world population). He was walking past a pack of Ealmon Holmes Ostriches which were Irish and used to present the lottery until Scott Mills stole there job when one of them grabbed his telegrater and ran off with it. He never saw it again until he was walking past his local bank Vagina May which is known today as Fanny May. The device was sitting on the street next to a half eaten kebab from the rat infested Indian resteraunt down the street. He was just about to bend over to pick up his telegrater when he saw Dale Winton looking at him so he couldnt’ bend down as Dale Winton was the town gay rapist at that time and still is. 10000 years later Paris Hilton was climbing out of her limo in Los Angeles without any pants on when she noticed the strange object. She picked it up and put it in her bag along with her spare breast implants and her dog Noodles. And that is the story of a cheese grater.
The End
